Gervanna Stephens is a Jamaican poet and proud Slytherin with congenital amputation living in Canada. She is Assistant Editor with The/tƐmz/Review, hates public speaking, has two sisters who are better writers than her & thinks unicorns laugh when we say they aren’t real. Recent or forthcoming work can be found in Moonchild Magazine, Ghost City Press, Montreal Writes and Yes Poetry.
The lord sees and hears and knows
everything? oozings and ecstasy
must your god wave their arms so wildly?
sometimes I hear a voice like a wight
and my neck tingles knowingly?
like numbness descends
still budding dread and forlorn
I have bedded a few people
burden of their touch seems less holy
not that I think about god watching
I mean deities plan better than that
fill their baskets with worship
other than shallow breaths and earthquaking expletives
is everything fair game for the believer?
how do I shatter this passing amen
this oh god
right there
again
the lord sees and hears and knows
everything? hush now
let me root myself in.
A lot of my writing has not been intentional or thematic, and at times I find myself grappling for inspiration. This poem for me is kind of like an abominable realization in the midst of moments like: ‘whoa, wait are we always on display for god?’ This poem was both the boundary and conversation I wanted to have about forming connections and how things become real when we can touch them. How even in the most intimate moments we are all always spiritual beings with our utterings; and how that level of judgment and fear for the believer can be disregarded till the high ceases.