.chisaraokwu. | The Suicide Bomber Climbs A Mountain & Leaves A Note | Poets Resist

.chisaraokwu. is a Nigerian American poet, actress & healthcare futurist. Her writings have appeared or are forthcoming in Cider Press Review, Obsidian, Tinderbox Poetry Journal, The New England Journal of Medicine & others. She believes in Love and splits her time between the US & Italy.

.chisaraokwu.'s Website

Also by .chisaraokwu.: The Evolution of a Saint & Other Selected Poems Two Poems The Edge of Black

Poets Resist
Edited by Sarah Clark
December 26, 2018

.chisaraokwu.

The Suicide Bomber Climbs A Mountain & Leaves A Note

When the first trap was laid I didn’t see it for the mind-fuck it would be. This is how to say a prayer before you blow up a building or a body: Twice — one for yourself & one for your after-self. The vest is underneath the bed. No one comes into this space anyway. I took three moments & fisted them into a napalm then tied them between the dynamite sticks. The first moment was the rape you did not save me from. Who refuses to catch the sound of a child’s fright? You’re on a mission. If you can get to the cave in the wilderness, there’s a mountain there. Find yourself. The second moment was on the edge of spring. How dare a child become a woman, you said. That night you prayed to God & asked Him to make your child a broken one that she may not leave your side. The vest is heavy — there’s a grievance & a stone lodged between the vest & my bosom. Shut up, she says — find a way to be a better child don’t talk back to me — I brought you into this world & I will take you out. It’s not funny anymore. The third moment I was curled up in the fetal position smoking pot she said I need you to be the moon. But I am only earth & shitty earth at that. I wonder if this is how all mothers talk to their daughters in shifts The world is closing in on the daylight. Wrap it up — you are in a new city now & no one will know you. * The note read: I’m climbing to the mountain where I will see the entire city. Find your way there. * On the mountain, she lit the fuse. Her charred bones found in a shallow cave. She will be remembered as a caution.